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Amazing Adventures of Flak, The Play

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Amazing Adventures of Flak, The Play

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:43 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:43 pm

Cast of Characters

Flak
Flak is a hemophiliac superhero who possesses heat vision, running shoes of super speed, and a knack for getting things done. He lives with the twenty-six letters of the alphabet, two of which are his brothers.

D
Brother of Flak.

J
Brother of Flak.

A-C, E-I, K-Z
Not brothers of Flak.

L. Complex
A fearsome though frail villain with an obsession for making Flak look bad. Also likes mannequins.

Duk
A flying otaku and amateur poet. Duk has innumerable clones.

Gem-baka
A short college student with a peculiar and deplorable aesthetic.

Clerk of the Night
A shadowy figure who rides a computer keyboard. Vanishes in sunlight.

Amelia Sunshine "Sunny" Powers
A rich idiot, but no fool. Best friends with Hisame Kawamoto.

Hisame "Sammy" Kawamoto
A busty fool, but no idiot. Best friends with Amelia Sunshine Powers.

Yutaka
Legendary figure. Spoken of but never seen.
Last edited by KingCrazyGenius on Wed Sep 17, 2008 5:17 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:45 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:45 pm

Act 1 Scene 1

The suburbans of Berkeley, California.

Enter L. Complex wearing a Flak mask and Freightened Masses.


L. COMPLEX: Foolish college town! I, Flak, fall down upon thee like (pauses to think) like a Midwestern twister! Pay me $1,000,000 or I shall burn you all with my heat vision!

FREIGHTENED MASSES: Oh no! Flak has turned against us, and now threatens us with our choice of either poverty or a fiery death! Both so unappetizing!

FLAK (off stage): Not so fast, Mr. Complex!

Enter Flak.

FLAK: You have impersonated me for the last time...

Flak walks up to L. Complex and tears off mask.

FLAK: ...L. Complex!

FREIGHTENED MASSES (to themselves): Gasp! A revelation like none other!

L. COMPLEX: No! You have ruined my plan to get lots of money! This is unforgivable!

FLAK: You are the architect of your own failure, for you should have known better than to strike terror into the heart of my very neighborhood. Now I will vanquish you quickly, for Death Note is on in ten minutes, and I shan\'t miss even a moment of it!

L. COMPLEX: Oh Contrary, you heat visioning jerk, I shall vanish with the aid of ninja smoke bombs! But by the Robot Pants of Yutaka, I will be back!

(L. Complex throws a ninja smoke bomb at Flak, hitting him on the forehead. It fails to go off)

FLAK: Ow.

(Exit L. Complex)

FREIGHTENED MASSES: Give chase, noble Flak! End his reign of terror!

FLAK: Rubbish! Was it not said that Death Note was on in ten minutes? I depart for home immediately. Resolve this matter yourselves, parasites!

(Exit Flak)

FREIGHTENED MASSES: A bold hero like none other, Flak is the eternal Sun!

Exeunt

End Scene
Last edited by KingCrazyGenius on Wed Sep 17, 2008 5:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Unread postby Flak on Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:07 pm

Unread postby Flak » Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:07 pm

I look forward to Act I, Scene II.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Unread postby Alar on Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:16 pm

Unread postby Alar » Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:16 pm

I boldly look forward to it!
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Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:36 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:36 pm

Act 1 Scene 2

The living room of Flak and the Twenty-Six letters of the alphabet. Flak is sitting down, starring at a television with a vacant and mesmerized look. A bottle of orange soda is beside him.

FLAK (very monotone): Yes...Ryuk likes apples

Enter Q carrying a note. Q approaches Flak in hopes of getting his attention.

Q: Uh...Flak?

(Flak continues to stare vacantly)

Q: Flak. Flak! (begins shaking Flak violently, continuing to repeat his name. Flak continues to fail to respond. Q then reaches for the orange soda, but his wrist is then grabbed by Flak.)

FLAK: The orange soda is mine and mine alone.

Q: Whatever, someone left this note for you.

(hands the note to Flak. Exit Q)

FLAK (reading aloud): Dear Flak. How are you? I am good. We should hang out more often. Love, L. Complex. PS: I had Duk and his clones kidnap your brothers while I distracted you, and you'll never see them again, noob.

(Flak destroys the letter with his heat vision, then shakes his fist violently towards the ceiling)

FLAK: Vengeance shall fall into my possession, L. Complex! When next we meet, not even the onset of a thousand anime series will prevent me from smiting you with infrered doom!

(Flak puts on his Running Shoes and blasts a hole in the living room wall, and then exits through the hole.)

End Scene
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Unread postby Alar on Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:48 pm

Unread postby Alar » Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:48 pm

I love this play. Moar plz!
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Unread postby Flak on Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:03 pm

Unread postby Flak » Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:03 pm

This is seriously good.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Unread postby Kefka on Mon Sep 17, 2007 8:50 am

Unread postby Kefka » Mon Sep 17, 2007 8:50 am

I cannot say how much I love this sir.

I truly do.
[00:40] <Boris> why are you screaming star fox quotes
[00:40] <Boris> at erotic fiction writers
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Unread postby Flak on Tue Sep 18, 2007 5:04 am

Unread postby Flak » Tue Sep 18, 2007 5:04 am

If KCG doesn't make his job week-long I will take over his spiel and start writing Amazing Adventures of KCG.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Wed Sep 19, 2007 6:31 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Wed Sep 19, 2007 6:31 pm

Act 1 Scene 3

The secret headquarters of L. Complex. D and J are in a cage with wheels, guarded by four Duk clones. Duk is also here, distinguished from his clones by wearing a red sash. D and J are playing chess inside the cage.

D: (moves a piece) You should release us.

J: (moves another piece) I agree. Or at least explain why we are here.

DUK: (rubbing chin) The complexities
of this plot are beyond you,
I too am confused

(D and J give each other a sideways glance, while the Duk clones make various animal noises in congratulations to their master's haiku.)

(Door opens, Enter L. Complex)

L. COMPLEX: (out loud to everyone) Ha ha! Everything is going according to plan. Now we have to hurry everything up. Duk!

(Duk stands at attention, making a ridiculous salute)

L. COMPLEX: Duk clones!

(Duk clones take to the air, barking like puppies)

L. COMPLEX: Prepare Operation: Zappity Doom. But first, gas the prisoners.

(The Duk clones descend on the cage and start exhaling into it forcefully. D and J faint seconds after this begins).

L. COMPLEX: And put the outside guards on high alert. Flak will probably get here sooner than later.

DUK: Like watermelons
being smashed with big rocks, Flak
will find his doom here!

(Exit Duk via open door. Cage is wheeled away by Duk clones, while large pieces of machinery lowered down from above, with a growing number of Duk clones flying about them. In the midst of it, L. Complex laughs maniacally while rubbing hands together.)

(End scene)
Last edited by KingCrazyGenius on Wed Sep 17, 2008 5:20 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Unread postby Alar on Wed Sep 19, 2007 7:12 pm

Unread postby Alar » Wed Sep 19, 2007 7:12 pm

-Claps happily- Wonderful!
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Unread postby Flak on Wed Sep 19, 2007 7:24 pm

Unread postby Flak » Wed Sep 19, 2007 7:24 pm

Haiku problems aside it was good. I can't wait to see what L. Complex is planning. Aside from, of course, the obvious invisible watermelon attack.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Thu Sep 20, 2007 10:18 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Thu Sep 20, 2007 10:18 pm

Act 1 Scene 4

The suburbans of Berkeley. The Sun has just set, and the Clerk of the Night rises from the ground, sitting on a giant computer keyboard.

CLERK: With daylight banished, the Clerk of the Night begins his work! But first, I must surf the Internets.

(Clerk of the Night pulls a surfboard-shaped computer mouse from hammer space.)

CLERK: Endless hours wasted looking at funny little pictures, but I wouldn't have it any other way!

(Enter Flak, eyes red with heat vision)

CLERK: Flak! Step into my office!

(Flak looks about in vain for the office in question for a few seconds, and then approaches the Clerk of the Night.)

CLERK: I assume you're here to pick up the Murphy Report?

(Flak destroys the mouse with heat vision. The Clerk of the Night slightly startled.)

FLAK: I require information that you possess. I know you possess it, for you surf the Internets.

CLERK: Oh indeed I do, but are you certain you want it? Do you really know what you are rushing into?

FLAK: Cooperate or your keyboard will be next.

(The Clerk of the Night stands up, as though to protect his keyboard)

CLERK: Ok! Ok, fine. Go to the abandoned mannequin factory down town. You'll find what you're looking for there.

FLAK: Now to bring finality to this insipid quest!

(Flak runs, exit Flak.)

CLERK: (Out loud) Hmph. Ha ha ha! A shame for you that you asked only the where, but not the why. All you've done in finding me is accelerated your doom.

(The Clerk of the Night sinks back into the ground. End Scene)
Last edited by KingCrazyGenius on Wed Sep 17, 2008 5:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Unread postby Alar on Thu Sep 20, 2007 10:27 pm

Unread postby Alar » Thu Sep 20, 2007 10:27 pm

I think it'd be safe to say, "DUN DUN DUUUUN!"
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Unread postby Flak on Fri Sep 21, 2007 2:36 am

Unread postby Flak » Fri Sep 21, 2007 2:36 am

Pssst, you can't accelerate doom, only its coming.

That aside, I like the cheshire cat aspect of the Clerk. And I also like how good Flak is at getting things done, it's admirable.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Fri Sep 21, 2007 5:13 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Fri Sep 21, 2007 5:13 pm

Psst, you can totally accelerate doom.
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Unread postby Flak on Mon Oct 08, 2007 2:38 am

Unread postby Flak » Mon Oct 08, 2007 2:38 am

Where's more? Seriously, needs more steady updating.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Re: Amazing Adventures of Flak, The Play

Unread postby Flak on Thu May 16, 2013 12:03 pm

Unread postby Flak » Thu May 16, 2013 12:03 pm

Hey KCG...
I am a necromancer!
:crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy:
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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Re: Amazing Adventures of Flak, The Play

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius on Fri May 17, 2013 6:46 pm

Unread postby KingCrazyGenius » Fri May 17, 2013 6:46 pm

I had forgotten this existed. And I think I would have been happier that way.

Seriously, characters actually having dialogue ruins the best part about the Amazing Adventures.
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Re: Amazing Adventures of Flak, The Play

Unread postby Flak on Fri May 17, 2013 8:43 pm

Unread postby Flak » Fri May 17, 2013 8:43 pm

What are you talking about this is excellent.
Flak wrote:annual rice tax!
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