Dreams of the Quill

Oh how the desk jobs dull the senses. Especially of time.

A Dark Cubicle
You are sitting in a dark cubicle – yours. The furnishings include a plain desk of cold hard varnished wood, a chair in which you sit, and a small wastebasket. They do not include anything else. There are several shadowy forms on the desk, one of which gently glows a sickly green. You know these as your computer monitor, keyboard, mouse, and desk clock. It is the clock which is glowing. The darkness does a passable job of masking the oppressive blandness of the space.

> x watch
On your wrist is a clunky digital watch. You wisely forgo straining to read the cracked display: your boss just went home recently; it is too early in your shift to be counting the minutes till closing time.

> wait
Nothing happens.

> wait an hour
(using time reference: boss went home recently) You wait an unknown period of time.

> x watch
(reading clunky digital watch) You consider straining to read the cracked display, but don’t feel like doing that right now.

> wait an hour
(using time reference: boss went home recently) You wait an unknown period of time.

> pass the time
Pass the time how?

> use computer
Please be more specific.

> turn on computer
The ancient Dell tower is already on.

> turn on monitor
You reach out for the monitor’s power switch. You kinda reach. You probably could push it but don’t feel like doing that right now.

> use keyboard
You aimlessly mash some keys. The ancient Dell tower beeps angrily at you. If you felt creative, you might imagine it to be saying, “You and me both, buddy.” But you don’t, so you don’t.

> x clock
The little analog desk clock rests on your desk. It is broken. The sickly green glow makes you feel slightly ill. The clock reads 10:00.

—- Time reference: boss went home recently subtracted from inventory.
—- Time reference: it’s always 10 o’clock added to inventory.

> wait an hour
(using time reference: it’s always 10 o’clock) You wait an unknown period of time.

> x clock
The little analog desk clock rests on your desk. It is broken. The sickly green glow makes you feel slightly ill. The clock reads 10:00.

> sigh at broken clock
You kick your desk so that the broken clock rattles back and forth awkwardly – a moderate expression of contempt for the world – and have a bit more energy.

—- Time reference: it’s always 10 o’clock subtracted from inventory.

> turn on monitor
You flip a switch and the massive CRT display on the desk buzzes to life, bathing the office in a soft blue light.

> check email
(at computer) You open your email client.

(at email client) (at computer) There is one new message, from Meow Meow Anim.

> read message
(at email client) (at computer) You read the message from Meow Meow Anim, to the effect that a new blog post has been posted on the blog.

The message includes a link, ostensibly to the new blog post.

> click link
(at email client) (at computer) You click the link in the email. The gears of the ancient Dell tower grind for a moment, and then one by one the divs of Meow Meow Anim are drawn over your email client. You struggle to read the words for a minute or two. Finally a bounding window is rendered around the web page, with a mercifully opaque background, and you can now make out the words of the blog post as distinct from the words of the email about the blog post.

> read blog post
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You read the blog post. It is about the Bible.

Your mind is blown. The reason for Meow Meow Anim’s author to have begun reading the Bible is unfathomable.

> post reply
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You reread the blog post. It is about the Bible.

Your mind is blown. The author of MMA has revealed himself a complete ignoramus. You are furious.

> post angry reply
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You re-reread the blog post. It is about the Bible.

Your mind is blown. You pray this is the last post the author of MMA ever makes on the topic. You fly into a rage.

> post angry reply
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You re-re read the blog post. It is about the Bible.

Your mind is blown. Genesis is NOT a rip-off of NHG! That show isn’t even good! Your rage has reached fever pitch.

> post angry reply
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) Your rage explodes in righteous indignation. You anonymously attack the Meow Meow Anim comment section with spoilerz.

You hit the Meow Meow Anim comment section but you fail to pierce its damage resistance. The Meow Meow Anim comment section takes no damage.

The Meow Meow Anim comments section bans you.

> post angry reply
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You have been logged out.

(at email client) (at computer) There are two new messages, both from Meow Meow Anim.

> read message
(at email client) (at computer) You read the first message from Meow Meow Anim, to the effect that a new reply has been posted in response to your last comment.

> delete message
(at email client) (at computer) Done.

(at email client) (at computer) There are two new messages, both from Meow Meow Anim.

> read message
(at email client) (at computer) You read the first message from Meow Meow Anim, to the effect that your last comment has been deleted due to spoilerz.

> delete message
(at email client) (at computer) Done.

(at email client) (at computer) There is one new message, from Meow Meow Anim.

> read message
(at email client) (at computer) You read the message from Meow Meow Anim, to the effect that you have been banned due to spoilerz.

> load Meow Meow Anim
(at computer) You load Meow Meow Anim. The comment section is ablaze with idolatry for Meow Meow Anim’s author and misinformation and misunderstandings related to the Bible, all in need of correction.

> post angry reply
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You re-re reread the blog post. It is about the Bible.

Your mind is focused in rage. Time doesn’t work like that!

> don internets superhero garb
(at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) “Oh Noes! Someone is wrong on the internet! SRS BSNS MODE ENGAGE!!!”

> post angry reply
(at SRS BSNS MODE = ON) (at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) You anonymously attack the Meow Meow Anim comment section with a spoilerz/insultz combo. You hit and score a mighty blow! The Meow Meow Anim comment section takes 48 damage.

The Meow Meow Anim comments section is dazed. Somewhere in Los Angeles a fanboi cuts himself with razor blades.

There is a flash as 5:30 comes and goes, but you miss it.

> post angry reply
(at SRS BSNS MODE = ON) (at Meow Meow Anim) (at computer) It’s time to up the ante. No more simple spoilerz, no silly insultz. This case calls for a straight-up honest-to-God theological dissertation. If they want to get educated, you’re gonna educate them.

You really give this one the time it deserves.

Approximately eighty minutes later the masterpiece is complete, a divine Layething of the Smaketh Down the likes of which the Meow Meow Anim comments section hasn’t seen since that other one two weeks back in response to the post about Shana figurines with heat-sensitive color-changing hair. Man, that was one stupid blog post.

You anonymously attack the Meow Meow Anim comment section with political flamebait.

> turn and click away in slow motion
(at computer) You don’t wait to see the outcome. You don’t need to. Who’s got time to watch a flamewar? You don’t look back. You keep on shining. You don’t think about the n00bs you’ve pwned.

As you keep on walking, you accidentally the clunky digital watch on your wrist. It’s approximately 7:00 am. Your shift ended an hour and a half ago.

> close web browser
(at computer) Your web browser finally concludes its slow motion close.
(at email client) (at computer) There are no new messages.

It occurs to you that your West Coast girlfriend may have gotten bored with you. It is a harsh come-down from the high of a moment ago. You feel defeated, and slump back in your chair.

> go home
You don’t feel like doing that right now.

> sigh
“Maybe she got bored with me,” you mutter, giving voice to the voice in your head – a miserably lame expression of scorn for the world – and have marginally more energy.

> shut off computer
You gather all your strength and get to your feet, powering off the Dell without shutting it down properly first.

> shut off monitor
Yeah. You flip the switch on the monitor too.

> exit cubicle
Yeah.

A somewhat-lit cubicle farm
You’re standing in an somewhat-below-par cubicle farm, just outside the human cubby hole you call your own. The lights are on, now that the sun is out. People are milling hither and thither. They are your colleagues – or they would be if you and they acknowledged each other as such. One is moving straight towards you.

> dodge
With an “excuse me” you clumsily evade your would-be colleague and related social interactions, avoiding physical and eye contact as you make your way to the exit.

Parking lot in Queens
You’re standing in a parking lot in Queens. Behind you is the dreary building to which your nights belong. In front of you is the glorious day, the sky a nice, soft cerulean.

“But seriously,” you wonder, “what was Meow thinking?”

—- Stage Clear —-

—- Would you like to save your progress so far? (y/n)

> y

—- Progress saved

—- Proceed to the next stage? (y/n)

> y

—- Loading…
—- Loading….
—- Please wait….

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