Dreams of the Quill

Aaaand with this I’ve finished the bonus chapters for this week.
*sings* Gotta keep my customers satisfied, satisfied~

+king_j: Um, excuse me?
@japes_11: ah, never mind
@japes_11: guess you’re not the gaming type

Joe considered that one for a minute as Dan and Sam engaged in a heated argument regarding whether or not Galactic Civilizations II was better than its predecessor.

+king_j: Actually, I quite love games.
+king_j: For example, Tetris.

“TETRIS!!”

Joe swiveled around to see Dan standing just outside his cubicle, starry-eyed.

“Best. Game. Ever,” professed the redhead.

Joe raised one eyebrow as he tried to laugh. Dan calmly strode away, back to his own desk. Joe returned his attention to the chat room.

+sam_b: heh
+sam_b: get pused to itp, good sir
+sam_b: dan’s thpe noisy typpe
+king_j: I… see.

Joe sighed heavily. Was every day going to be like this? He was fine and all with the IRC dynamic, but Sam’s p key was starting to bug him and he’d only typed a few lines. Besides, Ms. Harris had said something about ‘real work’—chatting about video games was hardly ‘real work.’

+king_j: So, what exactly is my assignment—do any of you know?
@japes_11: hard worker eh, right to the point
@japes_11: i think you’re just doing customer relations or something easy like that
@japes_11: boss lady said we could use you however we wanted
@japes_11: and sam’s especially swamped
@japes_11: since none of the rest of us like interacting with people all that much ;)
+dan_s: it’s a seniority thing
+dan_s: right, jp? :D
@japes_11: that’s right
+sam_b: curpses! ;)
+king_j: I… see.
+king_j: So because I’m new to the team, I’m … doing what exactly?

Joe had a bad feeling about what the answer would be. A really, really bad feeling.

@japes_11: answering phone calls, replying to e-mails
@japes_11: responding to the concerns of our customers
@japes_11: all the folks who ride with us and have problems
+king_j: That sounds… lovely.

“NICE!”

Joe turned to see Dan standing outside his cubicle once more, giving him a double thumbs-up.

“Good to see initiative and optimism in a new team member!”

“… r-right,” replied Joe, containing his displeasure with his assignment. Dan trotted back to his desk. Joe added, under his breath, “I do hope you stop doing that.”

+sam_b: i justp set pyou upp witph — gyah

Joe heard a phone ring nearby. A voice too cheerful to be anyone’s but Dan’s answered it. Moments later, new dialogue displayed itself in the chat.

+dan_s: sam says he’s tired of typing
+dan_s: so he’s dictating–something for you, joe
+dan_s: he says:
+dan_s: ’sorry this took so long. i had to log into the system to do this, and that required a username and password, and i kept writing spam instead of sam… well, anyway, i set you up with permission to access the customer service e-mail account, and i routed the customer service hotline to your desk phone. you know our policies and boss lady should have given you new copies of them. follow’em and keep the customers satisfied’

Before Joe could finish reading the wall of text sent his way by Dan, his phone—a new addition to his office that he hadn’t even noticed until just then—rang.